Time Envy

AHHHHHH!!

Oh, for a few uninterrupted minutes to work on a blog post or rework my sermon (which is going to be delivered for real this Sunday). I am accomplishing everything needed this week, managing my time for everything required -- but oh, how I want to have more, more, more minutes to play with the words!

What a luxury, the time to waffle and vacillate and weigh my writing. I LOVE having time to read through and through passages, trusty thesaurus at my right hand. I tilt my head and feel the words in my mouth, tweaking tiny phrases that no one will notice, except in the abstract, "that read really nice" kind of way, after I'm done.

No one much cares about your syntax when you're writing PRIORITY! MUST SHIP OUT TODAY! emails. (Oh, woe is me. It's not as bad as that, really, since I usually find time for spell check and witticisms in a few routine memos a day. That at least provides a snack for the writing beast.)

Basically, I have time envy. While I have just as many minutes as I ever had each day, I want the kind of time I no longer have. I want to put off the real work of my life until about 10 p.m. or so and now, just now when the mood has struck, I want to climb under my comforter with a stack of references and a legal pad, and sit with the words until they arrange themselves nicely on my page. Now, I have work to be done. 9 to 5, yes-sir-ee-Bob, office WORK to be done.

Some days it's sad not to be a paid writer anymore.