Stuff, in Short Bursts

Here's "a Short Meme for what was for many a shortened week:
tell us about five noteworthy short things in your life." -- prompt from the RevGals site today

I. Short People
II. Short Hops
III. Short Stories
IV. Short Lists
V. Short Stops


I. This one time, at day camp (imagine an American Pie inflection... but don't really go there), I was about 6 & wanted desperately to be in a group act at the talent show. Some older girls asked me to join their party, and I was delighted. Our talent? "Dancing" to the Randy Newman song "Short People." We stood on our knees, having stuffed our bent legs into HUGE men's jeans. (The bottom half of each leg must have been tucked inside or folded under our knees, because these jeans would have been far too long.)
We put white pillow cases over our heads, with small cut outs for eyes and arms. We drew BIG, awkward smiley faces on our cases and glued on little tufts of yarn hair. We tucked the pillowcases into our oversizsed jeans (cinched with teenager's 1970s stretch belts, I imagine). We hobbled on stage en masse, probably looking a lot like Playskool Weebles. ("Weebles wobble but they don't fall down.")
The "performance" is a blur, but I vividly remember, as soon as the applause ended, collapsing on the floor. My knees were KILLING me! And I couldn't get them out of the straight-jacket jeans -- though I tried, even while still on stage.
It must have been quite the moment. Can you imagine? Weeble down! Weeble down!
One of the kind-hearted counselors (or just someone who wanted to get on with the show) had to pick me up. Exit stage right. Ever since that day, I have tried very hard 1.) Not to take to a stage in a pillowcase OR on my knees, and 2.) NEVER to stuff an entire bent leg in one half a blue jean.

II. When our child was 2, he got a green bath towel with a frog face on the hood and frog "feet" dangling from each corner. He would get out of the tub, wrap this plush rectangle about 3 times around his skinny, bent body, then "ribbit"his way from the bath to his bedroom. Hop, hop, hop, dragging terrycloth and stumbling on the two back feet all the way. Me: "Slow down, honey!" Him: "Rib-BIT! Rib-BIT! I can't, Mommie! I am a FrWAG, a FrWAG! Rib-BIT!"
...Priceless.

III. I'm quite a reader. Or, I was. And am. In fits and spurts, nowdays. But, oh, have I fanned the flame for good fiction in my time! I'm more bent toward novels than short stories, but it isn't hard to list several noteworthy gems.
In the category of Cheesy Short Story Confession, I remember I had this powerful thing for "The Tale-Tell Heart" by Edgar Alan Poe. I read it over and over -- just loved it! Thinking from today, I can't really say why, but I was fairly captivated by the tale in high school. Some hard core, Puritanical stuff in there -- a lot like Hawthorne's Scarlet Letter in many less words.
Moving to the category of Still Gets to Me -- read these more than once; they're powerful stuff! -- we have "Hills Like White Elephants" (Hemingway), "To Build a Fire" (Jack London), "A Small Good Thing" (heartbreaking Raymond Carver), "The Lottery" (Shirley Jackson -- also a fine memoirist) and "The Artificial Nigger" (Flannery O'Conner). (An aside: I can't believe I just typed that word. It feels all wrong, even in a title. Oh, the power of language!)
In the category of If You Have Not Read These Fine Examples of Writing, Please Go Find Them NOW, we have "Leaf Storm" (Gabriel Garcia Marquez... oh, the man is a gift to words!), "Shiloh" (Bobbie Ann Mason -- required reading if you're gonna even TRY to understand The South) and "Breakfast at Tiffany's" (Truman Capote -- so it's a novella, it's still short. And great. Stop by my house, I'll loan you my copy.)

IV. What do I know? I never make any. See lengthy graph above.

V. Again, I'm not so good with "SHORT" anything. If I stop short, it tends to be a full-on work outtage for hours/ days at end.
...Now, if Jer were around, I could have skewed those two words another way and written several nice things (that he would first impart to me) about the joys of the all-American pastime. But, since my spouse is out WORKING to improve our home, I had better take his lead and get back to my own daily business.

This has been a very enjoyable, if not particularly short, interlude.

Cheers and happy weekend, mis amigos!